Jooho Oh Oh 1
Mrs. Belden
Honors English 1
4 October 2014
One Of A Kind
I was looking through the attic in Dad’s house during Fourth of July weekend with Lillian and the kids, and I found a journal called One Of A Kind, written by me from the end of high school to the beginning of college written March 24th, 2006. Weird I thought as I opened it slowly dusting off the pages as I read: There was a hard pounding on the door, and it was Dad. When I woke up, there were birds chirping really loud out the window. The bed was like a magnet and I couldn’t get up. As I looked out the window, it hit me that it was the middle of August, and the leaves were changing colors and falling. After I got ready, I jumped in the car and picked Dan up for school. It was still pretty hot and humid outside, we lived in Indiana. Dans been my friend for a while now and he’s the only one who had my back when my mom passed away. When we got to school, the bell yelled as I ran to class. After school, I left to go to therapy with Dr. Jenkins to talk about depression and my one and only problem. There was a note on his door: “Collin appt. at 3:15”. It was weird to admit it but after I had gotten depression, I found something that I really enjoyed and it was to dance and perform in theatre class. Only a couple of my friends knew, and they still called me gay for it, however I was straight and was currently in a relationship with Lillian Seline. I didn’t like telling people I was in theatre because they’d make fun of me. Lillian didn’t really know I did theatre. She was on the volleyball and basketball team and so I never really brought it up to her because all we would talk about is basketball. I
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didn’t know how to deal with the problem and was thinking of quitting dancing. I don’t think dad would’ve liked me performing, because he only likes football and he would consider dancing or acting childish. Before mom died, when I was five I used to dance with her in the living room all the time, but now that she’s gone and I’m seventeen, I act and dance at a studio by myself. I’m also on the varsity soccer team and dad doesn’t know I dance and do theatre. At therapy, Dr. Jenkins said it was good that I was doing soccer and dancing and it wouldn’t be bad if I was open about it, but I didn’t want to be thought of as gay. Since college was coming up and I still didn’t know where I wanted to go, I kinda forgot about applying, but i’ve started to think about going to an art school for theatre. I know dad wouldn’t be pleased with my choice and I couldn’t stay in close touch with Lillian. We were both planning to go to Purdue University to pursue our dreams of going to medical school. When I got home, I decided to call Lillian and get dinner and I left to pick her up.
The sunset was light pink, blue, purple and orange with flat clouds and water droplets formed on the windows as rain started to pour down. When I thought of telling Lillian about plans for college, I got kinda nervous because we’ve both had thoughts of going to Purdue, but I thought it wasn’t what I wanted. I wanted to go to The College of Arts and Sciences in Washington D.C. When I picked Lillian up, I flat out told her I wanted to go to an art school. She looked at me confused, but since I had to choose quickly, I was up and open about it. She never knew I danced or acted but she didn’t seem to mind because she couldn’t do anything about it anyways. After dinner, I got home and dad was waiting in the living room watching TV.
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I walked up to my room and shut the door carefully. I fell asleep to Two Door Cinema Club playing in one ear through headphones as I grew more nervous.
The next day, I sat at my desk and decided to email the school for auditions. It was two weeks away in D.C. and I couldn’t be more excited to join the arts program. I shut my laptop and went to talk to dad about it. When I had first told him, he was laughing as if I was telling a joke, but then he got quiet and confused. After an hour long discussion of college, he was furious and stormed off. He disagreed to letting me go to an art school and said it wouldn’t get me anywhere in the future. I also called Lillian and since we didn’t have school on Monday, we decided to drive to Purdue and check out campus, and I could tell Lillian more about the school I wanted to go to. I’d gone to a dance studio after school for a while to practice, but I felt guilty to see dad mad. On the car ride, I had told Lillian I was auditioning soon she seemed disappointed that we wouldn’t be going to college together anymore, but put in a lot of support. After the long weekend, we drove back home. and it hit me that auditions were a week away. Nothing else was really on my mind then.
When school started, it was a long week before I headed down to Washington D.C. to do my audition on Saturday for the arts school. I walked in a large room with bright lights and three judges and I saw a big X marked in the middle of the stage as they welcomed me. When I was done, it would take a month to see if I had got into the school and so I headed back home. When I called Lillian, I had found out she got into Purdue University with a scholarship for basketball. I was cheerful, but we didn’t want to think about our relationship if we went to different schools. At school, I told Dan and others that I auditioned for an art school and they started laughing, and called me gay, but I guess it was okay because I knew I wasn’t and I was doing what I liked. Dad
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accepted the fact that I wanted to act and dance at a performing arts school and Lillian forgot about it. As soon as I had forgot all about the auditions, I came home to find an envelope sitting on the kitchen table and I ripped it open. It was from the Art school and I had gotten in. When I told Lillian the news, she was thrilled. The school year was almost over, and we met up to discuss plans for college and I waited so long to graduate and to start a new beginning.
On August 26th, 2005, I started college and moved in a dorm with a couple of people and I called Lillian frequently. Our relationship was still going okay and I agreed to meet up with her soon, dad was okay and doing well. Dan went to Notre Dame, and I walked to class with Andrea, a friend I made. I got to perform, learn lots and I figured this was what I wanted to do and was glad I didn’t let anyone get in the way of it. Life was starting to change in a good way and I was excited to see what would happen in the future.
I closed the book, went down stairs and showed Lillian and our kids what i’d written in a journal for a project in college nine years ago. To see Lillian and I got married and had kids was wonderful because we doubted it when we were young. Looking back, nothing really changed a whole lot, I performed a lot as I wanted, got a good job, married Lillian and dad was still doing okay. Reading the journal made me realize that I didn’t let others get in the way of what I wanted to do.